Money Can't Buy you Class

So! It's The Wife again, and now I'm going to delve into some girly topics.

As I'm sure everyone knows, the terrible Sex in the City 2 movie is hitting theaters soon. Yah!!! But that's not what I'm going to be talking about. I mean, Carrie was a notorious fan of martinis and fruity cocktails and other things ladies apparently like rather than beer.

So, not only is Sex in the City 2 the talk of lady-town, but so is The Real Housewives of New York! Now, this is something I can get behind!

As we all know, there are some awesome ladies on this show. Bethenny is the lady who was naked on a billboard and just had a baby. Jill is the redhead who likes to freak out at people and has a husband whose face is on too tight. Ramona is the bug-eyed one. Alex is the Brooklyn one whose kids have absurd names. Sonja is the new one that no one knows. Kelly is the insane person who was a model and runs in traffic for fun. And Countess LuAnn is, well, the countess of the bunch.

Now, these ladies try to constantly prove to the world that they are rich and well-off and super special. Kelly, however, is ruining this for all of them! Her drink of choice??? BEER.

Well, this is a problem for these superficial ladies. The media tells us that men drink beer and women just don't. And those women who do drink beer, really only do so because they can get it in lower calorie form. Right now, Miller has a commercial series with the tag-line "Man up" and has the bartender telling men to "lose the skirt" or "lose the purse" when they ask for any light beer and not a Miller (since in this commercial-alternate-universe we're to believe that Miller has great taste). These commercials just push the point home that only a woman would order a light beer that was bad tasting and that a real man wouldn't.

So, back to Kelly. She is ruining the champagne-drinking, bling-wearing, Hamptons-house-owning reputation of this classy group! She drinks beer, and all of the other women comment on how weird it is.

It is understandable that after years and years of being told that beer drinking is a man's game, many women would find it weird to be a beer drinker, but this needs to end. When will there be a show or movie about sophisticated women who drink brews and not bubbly?

Because historically, beer was a woman's game. In fact, (And I LOVE FACTS!) women probably invented beer!!

According to the telegraph:

Women created beer and for thousands of years it was only they who were allowed to operate breweries and drink beer. The drink is now almost exclusively marketed to men - with television characters such as Homer Simpson the epitome of the beer-loving male.

Nearly 7,000 years ago in Mesopotamia and Sumeria, so important were their skills that they were the only ones allowed to brew the drink or run any taverns.

And in many ancient societies beer was also considered to be a gift from a goddess, not a male god. (although, of course, the Greek god Silenus is the most known beer god and is a male...but I digress. This parenthetical is simply a preemptive strike against poster Greg.)

Between the eighth and tenth centuries AD the Vikings spread terror by rampaging through Europe, fueled by women-made ale.

Women were the exclusive brewers in Norse society and all equipment by law remained their property.

And Ancient Finland also credits the creation of beer to the women, with bear's saliva and wild honey the apparent first ingredients.

In England ale was traditionally made in the home by women. They were known as brewsters or ale-wives and the sale of the drink provided a valuable income for many households.

But, by the start of the late 18th century and the Industrial Revolution, new methods of making beer meant women's contribution slowly started to decline and be forgotten.

So! Kelly, while she may be an insane person who loves to run in the middle of Fifth Avenue while cabs honk at her to get out of their way, is a beer drinking role model for us all.

Or something.