Monday, March 15, 2010

When the Nets Come to Brooklyn, What Will Spike Lee Do?

I didn't have much to do tonight, so I had planned on penning a giant post about how dumb the German purity laws are and why America is the best beer country in the world. Instead I watched the 30 for 30 documentary Winning Time: Reggie Miller vs. The New York Knicks. While the atmosphere wasn't nearly as intense as the Garden games, I saw Reggie Miller's Pacers play the Suns three times in the mid-90s as a kid. This documentary just confirmed everything I thought then. Reggie Miller is an a-hole. I wouldn't say I have anywhere near a Spurs/Paxson/Devin Harris level of hate for him, but to make a strained beer analogy (the analogy being strained, not an analogy about strained beer, which I don't even know what that would be), Reggie Miller is the Bud American Ale of basketball players. Man, this analogy is so strained I don't even feel like explaining it. They're both bad but act like they're good? I don't know. Wait! I have a better one. Reggie Miller is the Miller Lite of beers. You remember all those Miller Lite adds where they talk about winning all those beer awards, like Best American Light Style Lager and other nonsense like that? Congratulations, you won the always competitive, "The Piss-water Beer that Tastes the Least Like Piss and the Most Like Water" Award. So Reggie's documentary is called winning time? What'd he win? One conference semi-finals? Exactly.

Look. Don't say it. Just don't say it. I swear to Satan if anyone brings it up I'll lose it. I'm not even going to mention what it is you're not to bring up. Fine, I'll just go watch the following two videos and cry myself to sleep if that's what you want.






(Last night I had three beers on the couch: 1 Brooklyn Monster Ale, 1 Speakeasy Prohibition Ale, and 1 Famosa)

Total Beers: 224
Where I Should Be: 200 (whoa, this is eerie, 200 exactly is where I should be, no decimals or anything)

1 comment:

  1. But seriously...what WILL Spike Lee do?? Knicks? Brooklyn? What does he love more?

    ReplyDelete